Yo Mama Jokes

I worry about the younger generation. I don’t think they’re as funny as my generation. Maybe it’s because they’re spoiled, accustomed to living comfortably, content to forever suck on the teat of future generations. And because of this, perhaps they are not able to generate comedic material of the same quality as their forbearers. All I know is, when I was 12, I was a shitload funnier than the d-bag 12-year-old next door. The best zingers he can throw at me are, “Nice receding hairline—can I wax your head for ya?” or “Tell your wife thanks for the milk she left me in the fridge.” While these “jokes” are funny, they’re slightly too factual to be considered real jokes.

When I was an adolescent, the measure of a young man’s prowess hinged on his ability to quickly and frequently draw from a reservoir of “Yo Mama” jokes, to insult and degrade those he considered a threat to his harem of 17-year-old Argentinean models (at least in my school). Some examples are:

“Yo Mama’s so stupid, it took her two hours to watch ’60 Minutes.’”
“Yo Mama’s so fat, she jumped up in the air and got stuck.”
“Yo Mama’s so ugly, they didn’t give her a costume when she auditioned for ‘Star Wars.’”

You get the idea. However, I’ve realized that these jokes haven’t evolved much over time, and maybe we could help the younger generations by giving them some new material (god knows they won’t come up with it on their own). So I’ve created some new “Yo Mama” jokes to get the ball rolling, and please keep in mind that I’m completely shitfaced right now. If anyone reads this blog, feel free to add your own. And if you don’t read this blog, suck it.

1 ) Yo Mama is so ugly, she was rejected from “Flava Of Love.”
2) Yo Mama is so fat, she put a down payment on a Waffle House.
3) Yo Mama is so slutty, she thought “Cash For Clunkers” was a proposition.
4) Yo Mama is so loose, students are now required to write on “YoMama-Leaf Paper.” – FUCK YOU THAT’S AWESOME
5) Yo Mama is so trashy, I leave her in my front yard on Sunday nights.
6) Yo Mama is so old, she shampoos her muff with Head & Shoulders.

You’re welcome.